Dave, like most cats is quantum. He effortlessly ‘appears’ out of nowhere. He’s secretly my favourite.

I once did something not very nice to Dave. He was sat on the lid of a pedal bin. I stomped on the pedal. Suffice to say, he scowled at me for several days.

We are very much friends again now. It shows his strength of character to forgive me for that.

The other cat, Kiki makes a big play with mice. She toys with them relentlessly before finally devouring them, leaving body parts for us bipeds to see the endeavours of her mousing. There was comment a while ago that Dave was not mousing as much. I think he heard this, because one morning a few days later, about dawn, I was sat on the back step. Dave appeared out of whatever quantum plane he’d been in previously, into the present one, and pounced on a mouse. Efficiently, he simply gulped it in two swallows, sucking in the tail like a string of spaghetti, and skulked off. He’s an effortless mouser, he just doesn’t like to make a big fuss of it.

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